“Her Smile So lit” written by Frandriguez Fiduciaries & untrustworthy Part 4 Mixed feelings Chapter 24
“We are having a multi team outing at the hard-rock cafe, our food will be catered” said Seth during our team meeting. I was happy I knew that meant we were going to eat at the buffet and it would be company paid. I had been to the Seminole Hard Rock hotel and casino a few times, and it was always a good time.
The day of the team outing arrived and some of the agents carpooled to the casino. Things were lively inside, with multiple slot machines and poker tables in various areas of the casino. The casino was decorated with paintings, memorabilia, and chandeliers hanging high above from the ceilings. There was a dance club and plenty of lounge areas and bars on our way to the buffet restaurant which was located on the 2nd floor.
The buffet restaurant was very big, and there was a large variety of food to choose from. I had about three platefuls of food, including seafood, pasta, and steak. While I was eating a member of my team named Kev sat down next to me. I liked Kev he was a proud military veteran who took the job to help fund his retirement plans of traveling the country with his wife in an RV. Kev was a big and tall man with reddish/blonde thin and balding hair, he wore glasses and was generally always in good spirits.
It was nice to sit and joke with Kev since I knew he would be leaving the company soon. Kev explained to me that he disagreed with the direction the company was heading and did not want to be a part of it. He didn’t really go into a whole lot of detail except that he felt strongly against the plans and had a discussion about it with Chuck the sales manager. I guess it was classified information? Chuck who also had a military career prior to working for the company was Seth’s superior and never spoke to me about anything concerning or any future changes within the company.
After we ate we were allowed to enjoy ourselves at the casino. Some of the agents were taking pictures in front of a billboard. As I was walking past them, my Supervisor Seth and some of the agents grabbed me and pushed me in front of the billboard to take photos. At the same time Bester and some of the other agents did the same thing to another female agent so that we were standing next to each other.
She looked like she was dressed up for an event like a banquet, she had on a long red dress and nice earrings. Her hair was tied up. She looked at me then took a deep breath and gave me a big smile. I had seen her before she would always give me a cheerful smile and say hello. I thought she was a sweet and nice person. I remember overhearing her speak about the father of her children and she was basically going through the drama of a break up and in the process of divorcing him.
I looked at her and smiled, she posed for the camera gave her best smile raised her hand in the air and put up the peace sign or bunny rabbit ears. I faced the cameras and smiled and a burst of lights flashed as our picture was taken together. It really was rather bizarre. After the team outing was over I took a plate of food to go and drove to my then fiancé’s apartment.
When I arrived at my fiance Damaris’s apartment she was excited, she had prepared dinner already. So I ate her food which was really good, a typical traditional Puerto Rican dish of rice and beans with tostones and chicken. The tostones were so good, sautéed in olive oil and flavored with garlic and seasoning. The chicken was marinated in a broth that was packed with flavor. An easy to prepare meal but it takes a little bit of time to make the the chicken.
Dinner was great and we joked around a bit, afterward I went to shower. When I came out of the shower Damaris was watching television. This was normal for her on a work night, she would come home, prepare dinner, tend to her daughter, shower, watch her shows then go to bed. When I came over there was always something extra added to her night. On this night I came out of the shower and I thought I would surprise her, give her a bit of a scare.
As I crept up on her I saw she was quietly crying to herself. I gave her a moment then I returned and asked if she was ok. She didn’t really say anything, she wiped her tears off of her face, turned off the television and went to the bedroom. I didn’t want her feeling sad so I knew to “kiss it better” like the song from RIHANNA. Damaris and I had poor communication, she never really expressed her feelings. But still we communicated through emotion, through our sense of touch, I knew she was in love with me at that point in our relationship. Her feelings were strong for me.
That’s the way it was, Damaris would cry from time to time. She had been through much emotional pain in her life, and she kept it bottled up inside. Especially surrounding her childhood with a horrible step father and a ridiculously jealous and controlling baby father. Damaris said her baby father would have cameras set up around their home and watch her all the time. The lack of trust and privacy made her uneasy. She felt like his prisoner and left him one day after coming home and seeing her daughter was not being taken care of by him or his family who would baby sit for her while she was at work.
I knew Danaris’s baby father growing up in New York City. Not intended in the least but in a bit of karma it was he who was with my ex girlfriend Samantha the night we broke up back when I was just a teenager. Now I was with his ex woman and she asked me to live with her.
Damaris and I would hang out with our friends and family together. We would drink, dance, and fight. We really had a great time. But our drunken fights would lead to break ups and in my frustration with her at the time I would hook up with other woman very quickly usually the same night. At the time I thought we are not together so I am going to have my fun, I don’t need her. I didn’t want to feel like I needed her. I didn’t want to feel weak or used. Especially how deep our love was, I didn’t want to feel pain.
One time Damaris and I went to a bar with a close childhood friend of mine and his wife. The bar was small with two pool tables but it was still a great place to hang out, they played great music. Danaris became close friends with his wife. It really was an ideal situation for us.
Damaris became aggressive with me after having some drinks and taking a few shots. We attracted a small group of men and women who started watching us. She tugged at my shirt and pushed me. We bumped into pool tables and knocked over drinks. I grabbed her and held her tight in my arms. I pulled her into me tight and kissed her strong, she was mine and everybody knew that.
Some of the men in the group looked at me and seemed entertained by our display, one of the men raised his drink to me and was smiling. They seemed to like me and accepted me in their bar nightlife culture.
My good friend was no stranger to drinking then getting into fights and brawls at clubs and bars. He had done about 7 years of prison time but he really wasn’t into that life any longer when we hung out together.
As big and strong as he was he still had many people start fights with him. I really didn’t get that because he would pummel men in fights. His reputation alone should lead you to not want to test him, yet each week he would tell me about another guy starting trouble with him. That never really happened when he and I hung out, well at least not often. I felt bad for him. My close friend was Bico and his sisters are my real cousins related through my fathers and their biological fathers side.
I remember those same men at the same bar getting into an altercation with another guy. The guy was a few inches taller than me and had braids he looked mixed, black and white and had on a designer shirt. The man who raised his drink to me was very tall and and had long braids. He grabbed the guy by his designer shirt and was yelling in his face, tugging him back and forth like a rag doll. When the bar closed at night some other guys showed up and a brawl was set off outside in the parking lot.
Bico immediately put his hands up to fight. Two guys rushed him throwing punches. He started backing away to avoid the blows. There was no clean get away for us I was caught up. I too found myself a part of the brawl. But when I went to help my friend one of the men who I faced threw his hands up in the air in frustration and gave me a look of disbelief.
This guy was just throwing punches at my friend who was much bigger than I and so were all the other guys his men were fighting against. But he did not want to fight with me? They backed away from Bico and I and we did the same. The brawl was over and we got into our car and left before the police showed up. I was not from that area of Florida so it was all so confusing for me.
I remember when Bico and I learned the radio station Wild 94.1 started spying on us, we knew because they were talking about events that involved Bico and I. We had to be careful because they were definitely being sneaky. Everybody remembers or heard of the impact the media had on the late hip-hop greats of 2pac and The Notorius B.I.G. The media contributed in large as part of the reason why those two hip-hop icons were murdered. Bico and I spoke about it briefly and proceeded with caution, we didn’t want that type of attention.
I was cutting a new record at that time and I had done a few new freestyles online and was looking for a new sound and producer to create with. My supervisor Seth learned about it and we discussed how I would be recording a new record soon, but he need not worry as it would not interfere with work. I remember how excited Seth became, he wanted to be involved but I did not want that.
Things became weird at work also. I remember being on a call and three of my coworkers were standing behind me eating blue crabs and staring at me. One of them a thin brown skin black woman named Tinee. I had known Tinee for year’s, she had even worked under me at our previous employer. Tinee and I had always gotten along great, she liked me very much and I liked her. It was all so strange, the way they were behaving.
At Damaris’s house I remember maintenance men showing up to do work. They had made us aware that they would be doing some plumbing work for the residents in the apartment complex. It was three men that showed up and they worked quickly and inspected all the faucets and switched out the adapters but I found it weird that they also looked over the electrical areas of the apartment like the light switches and wiring.
When I was first dating “La Cubaba Viva” I remember, a few big men showing up in construction wear with helmets on. They quickly worked on the roof and then knocked on the door and asked “La Cubana Viva” a few questions then left, I never saw them again after that. I remember hearing her say “he is a genuine guy.” It felt as though they were there to check me out, her new boyfriend.
The time period of weirdness started around the year 2016 – 2017. That’s when things started to become very strange for me and dangerous. I did not know what to do or who to turn to. I had to come up with a plan fast, and so I did.
